The Sea’s Embrace

May 1, 2023

Backstory

I began writing stories in April of 2023. I was living in Akureyri in the north of Iceland, temporarily. I arrived over Easter which is a rather long holiday here, and my Airbnb host was ignoring my messages. I called all the phone numbers I could find, even contacting Airbnb support. Finally, I got the code to enter my prison-cell of an accommodation. However, the host continued ignoring me, and I didn’t get the wifi password for a number of days. With nothing else to do, I began my writing journey. I began with poetry and a few stories. Those few stories ultimately became You, Man, Emotion following an unfortunate turn of events.

I began this story in Akureyri, but it grew too complicated for a short story. When I moved to Siglufjörður in May, I picked it up again with the intention of writing a full book. I wasn’t in the best state to do that, however, so I tried and tried until I gave up. I like the idea of this story, but it needed better planning to be something more.

Text

“Did you see that?” called Hannah. I turned around just as I heard a splash. All I saw was a small ripple.

“Was that a fish?” I asked. Then I looked at her. She wasn’t smiling like she normally would at the sight of an animal. She looked rather confused.

“Not a fish… It couldn’t have been a fish. But it was big, and it looked like it had hair.”

“A hairy fish? A big hairy fish? So that explains why nobody’s ever seen a troll! We’ve been looking in the wrong place!” I laughed and went over to her. She looked upset. I put my arm around her shoulder, but she pushed me away.

“It’s not funny. It wasn’t a fish. And it had hair.” She stormed off back towards the house.

I let her go. She must have been in a bad mood. I sat down and watched the waves crashing against the sand. I tried not to think about what might be making Hannah so upset. But the trying just made it more difficult. Was it that dad has been gone for so long? That mom left us alone? Or did I do something this time? It was pointless. I got up and went back to the house.

Hannah was in her room sorting her rocks and shells on the floor. I knocked on the open door and sat beside her.

“Are you alright?” I asked, “You know you can tell me if something’s bothering you.” She looked at me and sighed.

“It was just a fish. It’s not a big deal.” She sounded exasperated.

“I’m not talking about the fish. I mean, in general. Is there anything you want to talk about?”

She looked up and glared at me: “No.” She went back to her sorting. Feeling a little disheartened, I got up without saying anything and headed to the bakery.

I couldn’t help but think about everything as I walked. Maybe she doesn’t feel like I’m listening to her. The fish market wasn’t too out of the way, so I decided to stop by. I figured we could have fish, and I would have the chance to ask about a hairy fish, however ridiculous I might sound. If there is such a thing, Hannah would appreciate knowing that I made the effort to find out.

When I arrived, Robert was working through a pile of freshly caught fish. I felt bad for bothering him while he was clearly busy, but I had to ask:

“Hey, Robert.”

“Ah, Jonas! It’s been a while! You chose a good day to come by. The guys just dropped off the biggest catch of the season!”

“Looks good,” I replied. I was glad to see him in a talkative mood. I picked out what I wanted and watched as he prepared it.

“So, any word from your parents?”

“Nothing yet. I heard they’re doing fine, but no word from them directly.”

“That’s a shame. I gotta say, though, I admire how you take care of your sister and everything all this time.”

He gave me a sympathetic smile, but I couldn’t meet his eyes.

“I just do whatever’s necessary to get by.” I paused for a moment. It seemed as good of a time as any: “At least Hannah doesn’t make things difficult. Though now she’s on about some kind of hairy fish she thinks she saw.”

“Hairy fish?” Robert paused for a moment and looked up. “Did she say much about it?” He seemed interested which came as quite the surprise.

“She just said it was big and hairy. Well, actually she said that it couldn’t have been a fish. Just that it was ‘big’ and ‘looked like it had hair.’ But I was fairly close to her. When she called out, I just saw a small splash.”

Robert was listening intently. He set down his knife: “There are stories of strange creatures around these parts. Mermaids, sirens, all the like. I can’t say I’ve ever been brought a fish with hair or human limbs, but I’ve heard my share of stories.”

I stared at him for a minute, unable to make sense of what he was suggesting. He still hadn’t picked up his knife: “Are you saying you believe those stories?”

“I don’t know what to believe, but I’ve lived here long enough to know that whatever it is, it isn’t good.” He sighed and went back to work on the fish. “If you do see anything in the water, stay away.”

When he finished, I thanked him and went to the bakery. I figured a cake might bring the mood up a bit. And I didn’t want to think about what Robert had said.

“Hannah,” I called from the kitchen. A few creaky steps, and her head poked out by the stairs. I was holding the cake, and her eyes lit up once she saw it. She smiled and ran down.

“What’s the cake for?” she asked, looking over the fish.

“Who said we need a reason for a cake?” I smiled at her and began preparing our dinner.

“By the way, I asked Robert about that fish you saw. He said there might actually be a hairy fish.” Now she smiled back. I knew she just wanted to feel like I was listening; I felt a huge weight off my shoulders.

“Has he seen one before?”

I didn’t know what exactly to tell her. If I mentioned dangerous mermaids or sirens, she might be afraid of the sea for a while. The last thing I wanted was for her childish imagination to run wild with sea monsters.

“No, but some fishermen say they have,” I turned to face her, “and they say it’s dangerous, so don’t go anywhere near if you see it again.”

“Dangerous how?” I knew that look she gave me.

“Dangerous, as in stay away from it.” She didn’t need to hear the details, and I didn’t know if I even believed them. But I would rather be safe and make sure she didn’t go running into trouble.

We ate and I sent Hannah to bed. It was a dark and windy night. I sat at my study for a while, looking out over the sea, listening to the wind and crashing waves. Thinking back to my conversation with Robert, I decided to write mom a letter. This was the first time she left us alone, and the fact that we hadn’t heard from her or dad was worrying me. With the light of my candle and the sounds of nature, I wrote until I fell asleep.

I was outside. It wasn’t dark, but not quite dawn. I heard such a strange, beautiful song coming from the water. A wave washed over my feet. I wasn’t wearing my shoes. I waded towards the music. There were no boats or people that I could see. I looked around but didn’t recognize where I was. Our house was nowhere to be seen. 

Something soft brushed past my ankle. And again. I backed away, trying to see through the dark water. My foot came down on something that felt nothing like sand. It was soft, almost like seaweed, but far too fine. Panicking, I reached down and pulled a tangled mass from the sand. It was hair. All the while, the music grew louder, more intense. I tried to walk back to the shore, but my feet were trapped in the hair. Something broke the water in front of me. A mass of dark, flowing hair emerged, leading to what appeared to be massive scales disappearing below the surface. As I stared in horror, hands – strange, humanoid hands – worked their way out of the dark mass, brushing the hair aside. I was looking at the face of a woman. She looked at me with a sly smirk reminiscent of Hannah’s mischievous look.

The music was deafening – a chorus of hundreds of eerie voices. I tried to cover my ears, but I couldn’t move my arms. I tried to struggle, but she just watched and smiled at me. I tried to look away, but even my eyes were stuck, fixated on hers. Slowly, she retreated into the water. The song quieted down. The hair washed away from my feet. The moment I regained control of my body, I screamed.

“Are you okay?” Hannah was shaking me. Daylight streamed in from the curtains.

“It was just a bad dream.” I rubbed my eyes and sat up.

“Was it about mom and dad?” Hannah was looking at the letter on my desk.

“No,” I got up and folded the letter, “it was about the hairy fish, except it wasn’t a fish, and it wasn’t friendly.”

“I told you it couldn’t be a fish!”

“It was just a dream.” I looked at the clock. “And you’re going to be late for school.”

Hannah pouted and ran downstairs. I went over to my window and looked out at the sea once again. The details of my dream were slowly fading, but one image would not leave my mind: the face of that creature. Maybe Hannah’s imagination is the least of my concerns. 

The front door opened and closed, bringing me back to reality. I shuddered and prepared for my day.

My first order of business was sending my letter. I was hoping to get something too, but the post office had nothing for us. I stocked up on food on the way back, then returned to my studies. Chores and studying – such was my life. At least it was peaceful. And maybe, when mom and dad come back, they’d have the means to send me to an actual school where I can become a doctor. That was always my dream, anyway.

Afternoon came along, and the front door opened and closed once again. Loud footsteps ran up the stairs. “Jonas,” called Hannah, “look what I made today!”

I put down my book and looked as Hannah shoved a seashell necklace in my face.

“So that’s why you’ve been collecting shells!” I took it from her and looked it over. “You did a good job!” I handed it back, but she didn’t move. 

“It’s for you. To keep the hairy fish away.”

I hugged and thanked her, and she ran off. The front door opened and closed. I went to the window and watched her run off towards the beach. I laid the necklace on my nightstand and went back to reading.

It was getting dark, and I was getting hungry. Hannah wasn’t in her room, so I prepared dinner in peace. By the time it was ready, she still wasn’t back. I imagined that she was out looking for seashells, maybe making a necklace for herself. I put on my jacket and went to call her in.

Her small footprints led to the edge of the water where they were washed away. I looked around, but I didn’t see her anywhere. “Hannah!” I called out. No response. I just had to entertain her hairy fish nonsense. I rolled my eyes at the thought of combing the beach for her in the cold and dark as I started off to the west. That was where we were when she saw it; that’s where she was mostly likely to go.

No more footprints. That could only mean she was sifting in the water for more shells. I turned around and checked the eastern beach. Still nothing.  I must have missed her as she went back to the house.

Heading back the way I came, I looked all around for any signs of Hannah. When I reached my footprints alongside hers leading home, it didn’t look like there were any new prints. The thought that something might have happened to her suddenly gripped me. Not once have I ever worried about her safety. Now, my heart was racing.

I ran back inside. The food was still sitting out, untouched. “Hannah,” I called out as I ran up the stairs. She wasn’t there. A handful of shells were arranged on her desk. I went over and looked for a clue as to where she might have gone. Nothing. Did she find a new spot? Did she go to town?

The sun had long since gone behind the mountains. Its light was almost gone. I saw her go towards the sea. Where else could she be? I ran back to the beach. West, then east, there was no sign of her. I went back to where her footsteps met the water. I knelt down and ran my hand through the sand. If she was here, there won’t be any shells if that’s what she was doing. I didn’t see or feel any shells. But this time I wasn’t sure if that was a good or a bad thing.

I looked around, then knelt again to wash off the sand. That was when my racing heart stopped: around my finger was a thin clump of hair – long, dark hair. Not mine. Not Hannah’s. And by the water of all places.

It was dark now. I sprinted home to be sure: “Hannah!” No response. I went back to her room. She wasn’t there. Unsure of where else to look, I went to her desk and picked up her stack of drawings. She’d be furious to know I went through her stuff, but that was the least of my concerns.

A drawing of a shell necklace. A fish with hair instead of scales. A mountain with a snowy peak. A boat at sea. A cake. Four people, what I assumed to be us with mom and dad. A fish poking out from the water… with a smiling face… and parted hair. I didn’t mention a face… She didn’t mention a face. I dropped the drawings and ran back to the beach. “Not a fish” echoed through my head.

I went back to where our footsteps met the water. I sat and stared out into the vast darkness. I couldn’t think – my mind was blank. Tears ran down my cheeks. I just sat and stared.

I don’t know how long I sat there. Finally, I decided to go to the police station. It was all I could do. I stood up and turned towards the house. Suddenly, the wind ceased. It was eerily quiet. I couldn’t even hear the water on the shore. Dread overcame me as I turned around. Slowly, that terrible, beautiful singing whispered out to me from the sea. My dread turned to fear.

I looked down. I wasn’t in the water, and there was no hair at my feet. The song slowly grew louder. Is this another dream? I wanted to run, but I thought about Hannah.

“Hello?” I wanted to call out, but I only managed a shaky whisper. Then came the splash. The dark mass slowly emerged out in front of me. Then the hands parted the hair. I was looking at the face from my dream. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t look away. I was deafened by the singing.

She was too far from shore to be standing, yet she appeared to walk towards me. She was horrifyingly beautiful. Haunting, like the music. I was struck with awe and terror. If I could have spoken, I would have nothing to say. Were I not frozen, I wouldn’t have moved or avoided her gaze.

A few steps away, she stopped. She looked at me, that dreadful look, as her lips crept into a smile.

“Jonas!” Hannah was on top of me, violently shaking me. 

“Hannah?” Sitting up, I hugged her and wept.

“Why are you crying?” She looked surprised.

“I had a terrible dream. I thought the monster took you away,” I said, still holding her.

“Monster? You mean the fish?”

“It wasn’t a fish, Hannah. It was a monster, and it lured you into the sea and I thought I lost you.”

Hannah took the necklace from the night stand and put it around my neck.

“Don’t be scared, Jonas. I’m still here, and now you’re safe.” With that, she ran off downstairs.

It took me a while to gather myself. Finally, I got up and looked out the window. I stared at the spot where I had seen the creature. If there had been footsteps, they were lost to the wind. As I watched the motions of the water, my mind drifted between the eyes of that thing and the music. What did happen last night, anyway? I remembered making dinner, then looking for Hannah, but I didn’t recall going to bed. 

When I went downstairs, Hannah was sitting at the kitchen table with a pile of shells.

“I’m making one for me, too! Then you won’t have to worry about the fish monster,” she said gleefully.

“That’s a good idea.” I sat down across from her: “Is that what you were doing last night, collecting more shells?” 

She gave me a confused look: “I went before dark. Then you called me in for dinner, and I showed you them.”

“That’s right. Of course.” I got up and turned away. Whatever expression I had on my face, I felt that I had worried her enough for one day. Was I really so bothered by my dreams? I don’t remember anything from last night. I hurried back to my room and sat at my desk. The events of yesterday played through my head over and over again while I stared out at the sea. It all felt so real. Maybe I should ask Robert about his stories. Learning more might help put my mind at ease.

My thoughts wandered from mom and dad to Hannah; to the creature and the events of yesterday; to my first dream and the music. I closed my eyes and listened. I could almost make out that haunting melody from beneath the water. The wind whistling, a backdrop to the choir. The crashing waves pulling me in, an irresistible song of nature.

The front door opened and closed. I opened my eyes and jolted up, furiously shaking my head. I pulled the curtains and went downstairs. Throwing on my coat, I headed off to the fish market.